What Would Happen If Pets Had Thumbs?

You may have noticed that here at Twin Pines Veterinary Clinic,  we enjoy celebrating all of the various pet holidays on the calendar. March has one of the rally fun ones, with If Pets Had Thumbs Day. As you may know, many scientists credit mankind’s opposable thumbs with sparking that massive evolutionary leap that brought us out of the caveman era into modern civilization. What do you think would happen if your furry friend suddenly grew thumbs? We of course can’t ask Fido and Fluffy, but we have a pretty good idea. (Spoiler: mischief.) Read on as a local Askov, MN veterinarian offers some petucated guesses on the sort of havoc pets would create with thumbs. 

Throw Away The Vacuum

While Fido and Fluffy don’t agree on everything, they are on the same page about vacuum cleaners. You’d probably come home to find that household appliance on the side of the road.

Lock Each Other Out

Cats and dogs sometimes do get along quite well. They can even form strong bonds with one another, and sometimes even become bffs. However, they can also get jealous of each other. It wouldn’t exactly be a huge surprise if Fido and Fluffy were to lock each other out. 

Texting

Several humorous websites have made funny posts about imaginary texts between pets and their humans. We wouldn’t put this past them. It would be interesting to see what your pet would say! 

Hack Your Computer

This one would require our four-legged pals to not just grow thumbs, but also develop some computer skills. this may not be as far-fetched as it seems. After all, Fluffy has apparently been trying to learn through osmosis, by sleeping on warm keyboards and laptops for a few decades now.

Fido would probably entertain himself watching cute videos, or perhaps watching clips of squirrels. Fluffy may very well decide to become an internet troll. Next, dogs would probably download pictures of cute pups, toys, cheeseburgers, fire hydrants, and pretty parks. Kitties would deliberately delete all your files, install a moving aquarium screensaver, and then change all of your passwords to gibberish.

Take Tons Of Selfies

Fido and Fluffy are both extremely photogenic. We never get tired of seeing cute pet pics! You may find your furry buddies filling up your phone gallery with adorable (and funny) selfies. 

Try Their Paw At  Video Games

It wouldn’t be surprising if your pet decided to give video games a try. After all, dogs and cats are both hunters by nature. What would their favorites be? Fido may like Grand Theft Auto, Duck Hunt, and Frogger. Fluffy would probably prefer Pac Man, Tetris, or Space Invaders. 

Then again, your feline pal may be purrfectly content with her current games. You can actually download games for cats to play on a phone or tablet. Some kitties really enjoy ‘catching’ digital mice, fish, or bubbles … even without thumbs. Ask your Askov, MN for tips on keeping your kitty amused.

Go Through The Cupboards. And The Closets. And The Pantries.

Dogs and cats certainly do not see eye to eye on everything. For instance, they have wildly different opinions on things like car rides, baths, and litter boxes. However, this is one thing they would probably join forces on. However, they may have different goals. Your dog would of course be on the lookout for food, and would happily sample every single thing in the house. As for kitties …  Well, Fluffy would probably just empty out your drawers, hide anything important, and then rip the labels off all of your canned goods, just to be a jerk.

Go On Fun Adventures

It probably wouldn’t take pets very long to figure out that they can open doors. If Fido and Fluffy could let themselves out, well, there’s almost no end to the places they may want to go. 

Of course, our canine buddies do tend to be more adventurous than cats. A pooch may very well go let all of his canine pals out of their homes, and then head to a park, pet store, or beach.A kitty may stick close to home. 

Order Things Online

We should probably be grateful that our pets don’t actually have thumbs. Many people would find themselves in a bit of a pickle if their furry pals suddenly gained the ability to shop online.

As to what they would buy, well, we suspect that Fluffy would order all sorts of cat furniture, smoked salmon, live betta fish, catnip, spider plants, kitty shelves, cat enclosures, beds, boxes, scratching posts, beds, cat food, cat treats. She’d also probably order some random goods, like odd kitchen gadgets and silly doodads, just so she could have the empty boxes.

Dogs would probably be most interested in food and toys. You may find your canine buddy ordering dinner from, well, everywhere. Your porch or doorstep would probably be overflowing with packages! A pooch may also happily sign you up for all sorts of food clubs, as well as every toy and pupscription box he could find. 

Snag The Car Keys

Fido certainly has a healthy sense of adventure, so it stands to reason that he would want to go exploring.  A cross-country road trip to every dog park in the country may be a bit over-the-top, but it’s not completely out of the realm of possibility, either.

Of course, cats aren’t generally very fond of car rides. Your feline pal may just throw your keys into the nearest lake, river, or pond. She might also level up with the paw art she creates on windshields, and start using actual paint for her masterpieces.

Scratching … Lots Of Scratching

It’s always cute seeing pets close their eyes in bliss when you help them out by getting that itchy spot they can’t really reach. Your pet may immediately set about experimenting with different objects that may help them scratch a bit better. A back scratcher would immediately be commandeered, but we wouldn’t put it past pets to also use forks, spatulas, or other random objects.

Cancel Appointments With Their Askov, MN Veterinary Clinic

We love all of our furry patients. We understand that animal clinics can be scary to pets: the strange environment, unfamiliar smells, and scents of other nervous pets, some of whom may be sick, can understandably set pets on edge. We do everything we can to make appointments easy on Fido and Fluffy. However, we’ve not yet successfully explained to them that proper veterinary care is crucial to their health and well-being.

In other words, we may find our appointment calendars suspiciously becoming quite empty. If you take your four-legged pal to a groomer, their salon may also find themselves bombarded by cancellations. 

Love Notes

We can’t help but poke fun at our furry friends and their silly antics. However, at the end of the day, pets are very emotional, and get very attached to their humans. You may very well find a sweet note from your beloved pet! Then again, Fluffy may just ramp up her hunting methods, and start leaving piles of dead mice on your doorstep to show her appreciation. You never know with cats! 

Do you have questions about your pet’s health or care? Is your dog or cat due for an appointment? Contact us, your local Askov, MN pet hospital, today!